National Anthem
"We No Americano" - Yolanda Be Cool & Dcup
This upbeat Italian track was selected for its cultural values and its ability to get all the guidos to fist pump.
Guidoism will take society out of its boring, simple life and rule the world with upbeat tracks and endless tanning!
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Party Insignia: The Golden Tanning Bed
Guitopia was founded by a tan, fit group of guidos and guidettes only known as the Jersey Shore Cast. After realizing that during the summer when everyone was tan and fit, people were more attractive, and the cast had a vision of a never ending summer. With a lifestyle consisting of going to the gym, tanning, laundry, and non stop partying, these individuals became role models to Guitopia and everyone idolized them.
Guidos and Guidettes abide by the law of tanning. The golden tanning bed believes that all members of the Guitopian society must think of themselves as tan, attractive looking individuals. The golden tanning bed represents everything that Guidos and Guidettes sTANd for.
Guitopia was founded by a tan, fit group of guidos and guidettes only known as the Jersey Shore Cast. After realizing that during the summer when everyone was tan and fit, people were more attractive, and the cast had a vision of a never ending summer. With a lifestyle consisting of going to the gym, tanning, laundry, and non stop partying, these individuals became role models to Guitopia and everyone idolized them.Guidos and Guidettes abide by the law of tanning. The golden tanning bed believes that all members of the Guitopian society must think of themselves as tan, attractive looking individuals. The golden tanning bed represents everything that Guidos and Guidettes sTANd for.
Guitopia Oath
I promise
to stay faithful
to the tanning bed
and all of
Guitopia's values.
To stay fit and re
to look healthy.
To stay in the sun
and not take a single
sunny day for granted.
I will not judge
one on background
as long as they are tan,
it doesn't matter Italian or not.
Life should be devoted to
living a fit, tan and happy life
with no worries.
Guidoism forever under the sun.
I promise
to stay faithful
to the tanning bed
and all of
Guitopia's values.
To stay fit and re
to look healthy.
To stay in the sun
and not take a single
sunny day for granted.
I will not judge
one on background
as long as they are tan,
it doesn't matter Italian or not.
Life should be devoted to
living a fit, tan and happy life
with no worries.
Guidoism forever under the sun.
Party Ministries:
Ministry of Tanning and Bronzing: The MTB is in charge of all things tanning. Lotion, beds, no matter what it is as long as it involves tanning. It controls all things involving religion obtaining to the Golden Tanning Bed. It essentially coordinates all aspects of the government and has ultimate power over all of Guitopia. This branch is the powerful in Guitopia and is staffed by an elite, tan command known as the Guidos and Guidettes of the Jersey Shore.
Ministry of Gym: The MG is in charge of health. Whether it be going to to the gym, doctors, dentist, etc. This ministry is devoted to make sure all of the guidos are in excellent conditions. Guidos must go to the gym at least twice a day, go to the doctor's and dentist office for check ups and cleanings every six months. Guitopia has no fast food restaurants, in order to keep our society healthy because guidos party often and want to put foods that are not healthy for their bodies when they are under the influence.
Ministry of Laundry: The ML is in charge of keeping all Guitopia clean. Whether it is people or the actual topia. We are eco-friendly and keep the economy clean. It coordinates all aspects in everything that has to keep something clean. To do laundry every other day, take a shower everyday or to just keep the society litter-free and smelling nice. This ministry essentially organizes all dimensions of family life in this Guido and Guidette society.
Ministry of Tanning and Bronzing: The MTB is in charge of all things tanning. Lotion, beds, no matter what it is as long as it involves tanning. It controls all things involving religion obtaining to the Golden Tanning Bed. It essentially coordinates all aspects of the government and has ultimate power over all of Guitopia. This branch is the powerful in Guitopia and is staffed by an elite, tan command known as the Guidos and Guidettes of the Jersey Shore.
Ministry of Gym: The MG is in charge of health. Whether it be going to to the gym, doctors, dentist, etc. This ministry is devoted to make sure all of the guidos are in excellent conditions. Guidos must go to the gym at least twice a day, go to the doctor's and dentist office for check ups and cleanings every six months. Guitopia has no fast food restaurants, in order to keep our society healthy because guidos party often and want to put foods that are not healthy for their bodies when they are under the influence.
Ministry of Laundry: The ML is in charge of keeping all Guitopia clean. Whether it is people or the actual topia. We are eco-friendly and keep the economy clean. It coordinates all aspects in everything that has to keep something clean. To do laundry every other day, take a shower everyday or to just keep the society litter-free and smelling nice. This ministry essentially organizes all dimensions of family life in this Guido and Guidette society.
Entertainment
The social life of the people of Guitopia revolves around going to the beach, going to night clubs and partying. During the day they go to the beach and socialize there till its time to go home and get ready to go out for the night. Go into the city and appreciate all the different clubs there are and all the parties that are going on.
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